2023-04-02 A Meditation on Solo Focus

“After this Jesus revealed himself again to the disciples by the Sea of Tiberias, and he revealed himself in this way. Simon Peter, Thomas (called the Twin), Nathanael of Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee, and two others of his disciples were together. Simon Peter said to them, “I am going fishing.” They said to him, “We will go with you.” They went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing. Just as day was breaking, Jesus stood on the shore; yet the disciples did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to them, “Children, do you have any fish?” They answered him, “No.” He said to them, “Cast the net on the right side of the boat, and you will find some.” So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in, because of the quantity of fish.” (Jn 21:1–6 ESV)

It is said, to address spiritual concerns one must have a rather bleak outlook. One must have nowhere else to turn. One must feel that faith and faith alone can enlarge on the existential plight we live in. This is the pastor’s duty to shepherd those whom she or he has preached the gospel to. It is somehow to stay even-keeled precisely because of a leap of faith, a leap that launches into the unknown and into the wandering, pained, but satisfied soul. The soul is satisfied that faith and faith alone can shepherd the seeker through the hours of the day.

In prayer. In feeling question marks over one’s head: am I making good use of the time? For it is a strange and divine providence, the few attentive and waking hours, when it comes to anything that distracts us from prayerful subsistence. We get distracted, but also get excited: to do an honest day’s work, no worry for tomorrow’s gospel “Good morning!” to friends, but a lightly-held sense of simply trying our hand at something.

For to be an employee of the Christian Service is to make hay while the sun shines. It is to feel or explore that feeling that one’s reverie and slowness of uptake, is in fact not sin but divine calling unto a holy call to pray with one’s time. Yet we who have conceptions of holy things, do well to pursue them to the fullest. Lightly held. Not fussed over. Going gentler on ourselves. Quick to put down the obsessive mismatched task: too easy, too difficult, and just to waken once more to that perennial call that does not suffer distraction: the call to pastor, to address crisis situations, to lift all up in prayer… against these things there is no law (cf Ga 5:23).