2023-09-01 A Meditation on Serving As We Are Served
“22 Then it seemed good to the apostles and the elders, with the whole church, to choose men from among them and send them to Antioch with Paul and Barnabas. They sent Judas called Barsabbas, and Silas, leading men among the brothers, 23 with the following letter: “The brothers, both the apostles and the elders, to the brothers who are of the Gentiles in Antioch and Syria and Cilicia, greetings. 24 Since we have heard that some persons have gone out from us and troubled you with words, unsettling your minds, although we gave them no instructions, 25 it has seemed good to us, having come to one accord, to choose men and send them to you with our beloved Barnabas and Paul, 26 men who have risked their lives for the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” (Ac 15:22–26 ESV)
The military man or woman’s mindset is constantly nurtured because this person, this agent, has a duty unto a word meekly or rarely quite heard. We rarely hear the frustrated impatience of a son, a daughter, a romantic interest, a friend, a boss, a parent, a neighbor. When we do hear, it is easily delegated out of our conscious thought, for our conscious thought wishes for the “right word”, for solutions, for problems that can be tackled, or wishes to whisper away the absolute wall that has been hit.
When these our people are not going forward, the soldiering woman or man believes that a metaphorical embrace can just begin to nurture, as they were nurtured, to feed and succor as they were likewise fed and succored. But first: do not avert our gaze from the absolute wall that has been hit. Moreover, listen closely: it isn’t the plain facts as seen from a distance, but rather the heartbreak that occurs to each of us when simply we wished to prove ourselves better people, more responsible, capable of learning and willing to make change and amendment of life. If that is ambitious, so be it: each of us is forgiven for a little pride of deed.
The victory of the Gospel in our mindsets, is a victory traveled and true to the most wild deeds and assessments we make of ourselves. To the soldier, there is a Gospel of Strength: that we are strong on the flipside of finding ourselves totally corrupt and selfish. More than that, we get bigheaded when trusted with something, or we don’t have time for our friend or neighbor, or we forget that, being known as the people and agents of God, we are called to a level of circumspection and good representation of His Godhead. We are His agents and servants, His military and working company. And here, to speak of being better prepared for that metaphorical wall, to speak of being fed and nurtured, is to speak of investments made by loving forebearers, in each of our lives. Thereby we know love.
So the curriculum called Love is brief on some points, eager to send us forth into the battlefield, whilst also competent to try the most difficult cases without guile or presumption or know-it-all errors. We do not know all the answers, but have a poor-man’s faith that we walk away from the encounter having given something at least, a metaphorical embrace, a return to a childhood dismissal or lack of love or criticism that stung and festered. No, we are not demolishing the wall until we have taken a step in faith alone. Only then can we ascend, surmount, find ourselves teleported to the other side.
So we do not mock nor ridicule the plain existential question, “Why still?”; “Why can’t I?”; “Why am I unable to serve more gladly?” All these sentiments are holy and call us to a gospel that is knowledgeable of good and innocent of evil. They are holy sentiments that teach us not to explain everything away with a plausible storyline: we want to be that person for each other, who is a friend and is dependable and is reliable. There is no mere give and take, no zero-sum-game, but rather bad falls and hindrances occur to each of us. It seems that the more pure we become, the more our dreamspace is invaded. The more watchful we attain to, the more our waking desires are aroused. The more avoidance of ill speech and adherence to the Good Word, the more we begin to imagine strange interpretations and flawed mishearing. But in fact time and chance happen to all (Ecc 9:11).
So to the poor man’s, woman’s cry. To the magnanimous role as people disciplined out of willingness meeting love, we become all that and more for each other. We become capable of giving the gold star treatment to each other, knowing a Gospel quickly taught because it is in fact long taught over years, decades, of a person’s life. We are managers and ambassadors, planners and tacticians, of a trend towards Faith begun by the sharp and odd confession of faith in a few. In a radical crew. In a well-intentioned young supplicant, yet today it is these our brethren and sistren in the faith who are persecuted, trials within and hardships without. It is each of us with a call to accept an impossible gift called Shelter for our youthful belief system. For our inner child, and growing adolescent. For our ability to continue to love as love naturally comes to us, that is, as we are happy to serve the common good. All man may be dependent on a Heavenly Father to find anything Good in their arsenal, but having accepted this fallen state, we no longer fear to approach; we no longer worry to disappoint; we believe, and thereby are helped and capable of helping in return.