“8 Formerly, when you did not know God, you were enslaved to those that by nature are not gods. 9 But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how can you turn back again to the weak and worthless elementary principles of the world, whose slaves you want to be once more? 10 You observe days and months and seasons and years! 11 I am afraid I may have labored over you in vain. 12 Brothers, I entreat you, become as I am, for I also have become as you are. You did me no wrong. 13 You know it was because of a bodily ailment that I preached the gospel to you at first, 14 and though my condition was a trial to you, you did not scorn or despise me, but received me as an angel of God, as Christ Jesus. 15 What then has become of your blessedness? For I testify to you that, if possible, you would have gouged out your eyes and given them to me. 16 Have I then become your enemy by telling you the truth? 17 They make much of you, but for no good purpose. They want to shut you out, that you may make much of them. 18 It is always good to be made much of for a good purpose, and not only when I am present with you, 19 my little children, for whom I am again in the anguish of childbirth until Christ is formed in you! 20 I wish I could be present with you now and change my tone, for I am perplexed about you.” (Gal 4:8-20 ESV)

The aura of the Christian’s engagement, his or her expressiveness or cachet of sense and sensibility: taste edges towards a Wholistic or Remarkable, Memorable state of affairs. We Feel the sacrament. We Sense the aura. We Engage the mannerism. And is it after all Correct? Has it the Power to Save? Was it too melded with Common Sense, rather than with the Radical Cross of Christ?

In the eager enthusiasm to Rise up as fellows in arms, as militants for the Gospel, as the eager beavers of Illustrious Evangelism and Faith-Based principle, warring, engaged Minds: spirit counsels a gentler ministry, namely, to go to that same Sacrament, to question after that same Blanket Absolution. Are we felt out, healed, turned outwards from our inward regret or frustration or embarrassment or inappropriate thoughts? 

The moment of Decision is a bit like this, insofar as we look Elsewhere from ourselves: we look to something Efficacious, such as Christ hanging limp on His Cross, and suddenly it becomes moot the Fast (from food) we were so obsessed with, it becomes Obvious, that decision we were keeping on the back burner, it becomes Cogent, that mock-up of life together, of duty and deeds writ into stone. For all our deeds are writ in stone; we do well to remember this in that Hour of sudden unfurling, of sudden escapism from the strait-jacket, the urgency suddenly to feel a pang for the lost years, because all of a sudden we have a Mandate.

Strange to say! That enemies are proliferating or infesting in untold, discouraging ways. Having once seen this… it is the very Name of war itself that is on display, a situation when there is not as of yet a clear winner. So the two sides duke it out. But we are, insofar as being on display, proud to announce sacrifices made in Cruciform thought, that is, that we are Sent (on Mission) to these souls in order to Save and Evangelize. Nothing more! Whether the coming together is on home turf or on alien soil, Christ is the Victor. And He… through us… is the Mandate, the Mission, the Modicum of Repulsing, Pugnacious, Determined, forward antics.

The soldier has sacrificed much. Asking no more than a measured out fair share. Asking only for the right, empty-handed save for helmet and sidearm, to see Tomorrow’s gracious amber waves of grain and colorful sky-shows of rainbow peace, as she or he Engages and Sacrifices and Self-Immolates in the furnace of Respect, of Honor, of Duty. The soldier has indeed lived for a Tomorrow he or she may never themselves see, except in the next life.

The aura of the Christian’s engagement, then, is always revisited, corrected, healed, in the Good Name of a taste for what is righteous and true, a sense of, “here a little corrective is needed, because I was relying on my own strength or holiness”. The Sacrament should be obtuse or rude towards the egotistic Self. It should be plainly dealing in Healed Souls, Forgiven Supplicants, Cathartized Would-Be Travelers. It searches the inmost places, for a Light called New Tomorrow, Mercy, Dying to Self. It is not boastful but is Efficient and Effective. It makes All Comers kosher and holy unto the Lord, despite all regrets and evil memories. In so doing it may inspire the soldier to a New Resolution, a Determined Stride, a Fast (from foods) Concluded because all of a sudden it is “obvious”: “Proceed!” Proceed, young soul, because your Fast has turned spiritual, in the good name of a Resolution you’ve suddenly adopted. To fight. To laugh at how infested our people and homeland have become, but also to know there are spirits of lesser stature than Christ’s and that’s all that’s happening: we are the Victors in Him, in His Spirit.

But it will cost many everything. Until Tomorrow’s parties restores and resurrects. We trust fall into Him! He, His Spirit, has a Plan for us as well, one that is quite generous and surprisingly warm, peace-filled, non-cynical. That works, kind of like how despite Original Sin, in some ways society “just works”. Carries on. Lauds and upholds. Grants reprieve, even as we face our dying day. Avoids civil war. Marks and protects Beauty. And in this Hope we lay dying, or will one day.