2025-01-29 A Meditation on Awkward First Steps

“7 Tychicus will tell you all about my activities. He is a beloved brother and faithful minister and fellow servant in the Lord. 8 I have sent him to you for this very purpose, that you may know how we are and that he may encourage your hearts, 9 and with him Onesimus, our faithful and beloved brother, who is one of you. They will tell you of everything that has taken place here. 10 Aristarchus my fellow prisoner greets you, and Mark the cousin of Barnabas (concerning whom you have received instructions—if he comes to you, welcome him), 11 and Jesus who is called Justus. These are the only men of the circumcision among my fellow workers for the kingdom of God, and they have been a comfort to me. 12 Epaphras, who is one of you, a servant of Christ Jesus, greets you, always struggling on your behalf in his prayers, that you may stand mature and fully assured in all the will of God. 13 For I bear him witness that he has worked hard for you and for those in Laodicea and in Hierapolis. 14 Luke the beloved physician greets you, as does Demas. 15 Give my greetings to the brothers at Laodicea, and to Nympha and the church in her house. 16 And when this letter has been read among you, have it also read in the church of the Laodiceans; and see that you also read the letter from Laodicea. 17 And say to Archippus, “See that you fulfill the ministry that you have received in the Lord.” 18 I, Paul, write this greeting with my own hand. Remember my chains. Grace be with you.” (Col 4:7-18 ESV)

Being taken to a place we don’t want to go. Healing of nerves, of wishy-washy complacency, of the storm-tossed life. Storm-tossed, we wish upon a star: some grounding, some footwork, some adeptness, to thrive and Point Upward; it behooves us to point upward as though God Himself were our guarantor, our promise, our Mission.

But the bundle of nerves! The sanctioned ideas of daily refueling, rebooting, study and prayer. Our lives are flimsy apart from the One who held fast to the end. Our lives are mediocre apart from the one who descended to the hell of denial, and rescued us from its grasp.

To the place we don’t want to go: a testimony, a slate cleansed, a Faith in some trust-fall around conviction, confession, awareness: God’s soldiers are not weakened, not babied, not coddled, but rather Feel the import of the mission, and Feel the high expectations set, and Feel the opportunity to Be That Man, Woman! That Man of Woman who fit the glove, who was right for the job, no vain ambition but Duty: God, please turn my ambition to your glory! Please turn my pluck and fighting spirit to your ends! Please turn my weaker moments to the glory of the Great Physician! Who upbuilt us. Who heard the boos and the catcalls, but saw us warm to the sudden advent of God in the dialog.

Any progress on our own prerogative leaves a question unanswered; any progress post dying to ourself, is clean and of solid grounding. That is, our edifice is entirely what it is built upon: to pep talk oneself, to try and go the distance oneself, to try to Be Bold, Be Strong, Be of Good Courage, all this begins with the “I didn’t like going there” suture, puncture, discipline, woundedness of Conviction. Lord turn my rambunctious stress levels, my flailing against the strait-jacket, my frustrations and undisciplined ways to your Glory!