“5 For we know that if the tent that is our earthly home is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. 2 For in this tent we groan, longing to put on our heavenly dwelling, 3 if indeed by putting it on we may not be found naked. 4 For while we are still in this tent, we groan, being burdened—not that we would be unclothed, but that we would be further clothed, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. 5 He who has prepared us for this very thing is God, who has given us the Spirit as a guarantee. 6 So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord, 7 for we walk by faith, not by sight. 8 Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord. 9 So whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please him. 10 For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.” (2 Cor 5:1-10 ESV)

What dreams may come, forever scale, infinity scale: God uses broken instruments, rather, He christens Perfection that none can claim as their own. Error-prone and sinful, we are almost testifying more by the deeds cast our way than by anything we have accomplished or spoken out ourselves. We are almost testifying more by calm and quiet than by anything self-derived or self-originating.

All things revolve around the Will we be brave, outlandish at times; wise counsel once taught us, “Don’t be a goody-two-shoes…”, and Christ likewise sees His dying disciples either as self-righteously pleading, “I did everything you asked”, or hastening for the sake of the angels to lance forth at least one more good deed. That is, to originate the desire for a good deed somewhere, then to plead the Blood: that Christ has loved us apart from such good works. But not because we are “good” or “always treading holy water” or “patiently expecting to be blessed”.

Therefore the Christian soldier is sharp in uniform, grateful suddenly to have Yay and Nay as far as good deeds: doesn’t war make saints of all of us? Doesn’t strife answer our deepest existential needs for Purpose? Aren’t we to pat ourselves on the back for having reached our dream job? And some die holding in mind this dream.

The answer is that the Experiential learning of Basic Training or of Service boomerangs back to us as Civilians, as Community, as soldiers of a myriad type of stripe. In our intellectual antlers locked in contention. In our crystal clear Purpose for the education of our youth. In our Awareness… hence the myth of the homeless vet… of a more radicalized insight, more Truth, too much Truth for rubbing shoulders and doing the church picnic thing.

And we reach a point of self-awareness most confessed and yet not yet cured… faith may spring forth and remind us, end the fast! Speak the Truth! Send the email! No time to try and be perfect, what would you do on your dying day? Same as I already do! Because some assurances differentiate us from the dying agnostic or skeptic: we have some Image of a Truth unbelievable, so believable only under the guise of Patent Faith: and as such we believe in Eternity. We believe in Judgment. We do not desire to make it all go away, because whether here or on the flipside, we are to Adore and Serve our Father in Heaven. We are to Be Real, to Lighten up our Domain of influence. We are to soldier into a haze, something emerging from the Fog called Now, called Christ’s decision to go to His Cross that we might the more readily adopt ours. Our Duty. Our Purpose. Our Service. Our Individualistic half-cocked gamesmanship, to run the course set before us with Joy. Because many are the two alternatives: everything taken away (still will we rejoice!) or much handed back (we will not neglect to rejoice!). And our Hope, others get by on a tenth of what we personally seem to require, our Hope is untainted and set in Heaven.