2023-09-29 A Meditation on Drawing Near
“2 While they were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.” 3 Then after fasting and praying they laid their hands on them and sent them off.” (Ac 13:2–3 ESV)
Drawing near to holy things, there’s a certain sense of togetherness, a rejection of malignant spirits, caprice, angst, bottomless holes, greed, things that have not the power to build up. We draw near; we have our backers and our related life experience: good, that you didn’t start sooner, with less life experience, to draw near.
Our inner monologue, our status update, our homely testimony: these things dive in from a wealth of comeuppances: my cross may not be your cross. My finicky habits may not be yours. Maybe you were less sinful, had less wicked of a heart, outright denied the temptations. Maybe you didn’t speak back, talking over authority. Maybe you have “confessed” the heart out of anything that might be called sinful. Maybe today you are riding a wave of Good Tidings called Jesus.
The soldier draws near to holy things like war, like headphones at radio station, “Is there anyone sharp there? Anyone moral? Anyone instinctual and blessed by life experience? We have a situation…”. The soldier cannot long brook—it is not the people, per se, but the spirit surrounding these people vis-a-vis our own perspective, not anything intrinsic to their person—ignominy or distrust. The drug of longing, of murder, of rebellion, of disregard for all things holy, for Law and for its literal manifestations as portents of Power: these drugs ride a high pitiful and forlorn, poverty-stricken yet clamored after. By greed. By failing to appreciate what gifts of Christian wealth do exist: to be the one forgiving; to be the one supporting the down-and-out; to be the indefatigable priest and spiritual guide.
For signs and portents whisper of a spirit “out there”, to invite into our hearts “in here”. Such spirits are demonic, as Barth said (“Coitus without coexistence is demonic”; the same can be said for myriad relationships from friendship to master-servant), the world has perfection only in the guise of give-and-take, submission to a ruling board, not just the pontiff or the regent. There are aides and backers. There are consultants and theorists. There are muses and academics. We need the prince or princess, the king or queen, but only insofar as we have democratic variant on outdated motifs; we need both them and the servant, the soldier, the voter, the middle class, and all classes.