2022-12-23 A Meditation on Belonging

“Greet every saint in Christ Jesus. The brothers who are with me greet you. All the saints greet you, especially those of Caesar’s household.” (Php 4:21–22 ESV)

To our caretakers, parents, friends, aunts and uncles, the key takeaway from our newfound faith may not be the nitty-gritty details of a statement of faith, but rather the discovery of a community where we belong. Belonging is a mighty fine wish for our kids and our charges. Belonging comes with it trust, and with trust comes integrity. With integrity comes moral courage, to make a difference. And those parents, aunts, and uncles, see this if nothing else: that we are a mighty fine crowd. We are doing things a little differently than what their taste prescribes, but we are doing it in the good cheer and truth of a fine crowd where we belong.

This is no accommodation for strange political extremes or illicit idolatry of evil women or men of history; rather it is the plain observation that by and large, a healthy organization produces healthy-minded adherents. And we long for this to calm and assure parent and friend, that we have—if not today, then in a promised future—the pat on the back, the like-minded friend, the invite to Grow beyond those confines of a parents’ frustrated judgment. We are judged by frustrated parent when they consider our political bent or our lifestyle or our network of friends, but instead we should meet with their humored acknowledgment: yes, this is my son or daughter.

Thus to belong is to find an oasis in life, a future with fellow-travelers in the trenches and in the offices. Where there is command, we are. Where there is control, we are praying. To aid in the soldiering decisions, is to be near to boots on the ground. Leadership arises from within. We belong when we are with those who have made a similar cut with their former life: “Ma, pa, I still love ya, but I’m going to sign up to serve! And that will own me, and occupy my time. You may not agree, but just know this, that I’ve found fellow-travelers there, so you don’t need to worry about me!”. We are one mind.

One mind is always an elusive concept, but we do discover it as the sheep that we are, meek and supplicant, curious and brave. Strange how one long evening together can fortify for a lifetime ahead of us. We laughed. We had others pay attention to us. We weren’t judged. Puzzling also how just one friend gives us insane courage, to know we belong and that we are likable and beloved. We are good, socially-speaking (funny having even to address this). We are stammering and quiet around parent and older generation, but come into our own in the great host of heaven, our peers and our fellows in the ranks.

There is always some level of pain. Some disconnect, for we’ve done something—laying our life on the line—that was personally meaningful but that doesn’t necessarily mean something to those who judge us. There is pain because we want to come home, and announce in a gush of sentiment and love just how grateful we are for these our family members and community figures. But then there is a hush, no words come out, and that pain is something we have to live through internally, because it is difficult to formalize or get out into the air. And sometimes this may be for the best. We have a natural knack or desire to shelter loved ones, not to confront them with things that they won’t like, to keep our holy thoughts of peaceful signing up, to ourselves for now.